I don’t know where time goes. Do you?
A month has passed and I need more time so I have left my part time job at an art gallery. I have no idea how money will flow, but I know it will. I need more time to live a meaningful life, guided by intuition and the wisdom of the natural world around me, painting and writing to express the inexpressible, to speak for those who are mute like mycelia, oxygen, salmon, turtles, and trees, to inspire others to do the same.
My commitment to praying for salmon on the third weekend of every month gives a rhythm to my weeks. I am making time to create ritual for an ongoing-ever-deepening purpose and it feels good, right – somehow important despite my singularity.
September’s prayer weekend coincided with equinox and that gave an additional edge. What is balance? How do we bring balance back to the natural cycles? Who and what are we humans to this earth anyway? We are beauty makers and meaning makers at the same time we are wreakers of havoc.
My job is to remember my dependency.
As I hike the trail back from the mudflats an epiphany showers me with “aha’s”. I am NOT praying for salmon but for us humans.
I am sending my compassionate support to all those choosing to say, “What the f— am I doing to the natural systems that support me?” Ripping up another forest to plant a shopping center. Losing myself online instead of sharing laughter with a neighbor. Working at my desk until it’s too late to read my children to sleep or share the day’s stories with my partner. “What the F— am I doing?”
I pray for humans to come to their senses, literally and figuratively. I pray that we choose to live fully embodied lives rather than ones dominated by the head’s ego. I pray that we choose to remember what our ancestors knew: giving back to the land is necessary for nature to continue providing.
Science confirms that all life is inextricably and intricately intertwined, yet, we “moderns” keep taking as if there is no need to repay our debt.
As I walk back to the car, I recognize my own seamlessness with the world around me. My living and my dying belong to it. I am not cut out to be society’s paper doll propped up by the pretense of self-sufficiency, boundless abundance and endless happiness. Instead, I am plump with paradox and lean with simple truth: love IS the life force streaming through me, trees, rivers, creatures and the cosmos. Though my time here is brief, everything I do matters to that one great thread.
When I nourish the world, I strengthen the web which nourishes me.