A milestone – my last painting is finished for BIG.
Painting The Blessing focused and calmed me as I prepared to contribute to my friend J’s Celebration of Life yesterday. And, you dear readers of this blog, don’t know yet that my former son in law passed away on Friday. It has been an amazing experience to be with my extended family and grandchildren – filled with perfection, grace, engagement, healing and courage. The Blessing is for them as well.
I taped four papers together so the painting is roughly 44” by 66”. Taller than I am! I began the painting yesterday morning and returned to it after J’s ceremony. I finished it this morning. A week ago, I thought this final painting would somehow feature me as a tree, and I think that’s why I started it with blue vertical stripes. I simply squirted color on and then smeared it with a brush, because I knew I wanted to get as much of the white covered in color as quickly as I could.
But my soul, hands and arms, cried out for reds and oranges, so that came next. I don’t know how I had the wherewithal to capture it photographically, but I felt as if I had to. I knew from the beginning that this painting would take me on an unexpected journey and so it did. I wanted to know myself how I got from start to finish!
The miracle of how my son in law slipped out of his body and into the ethers moves me deeply and I keep feeling the presence of otherwordly helpers – angels, dieties, spirits – Quickly I gave over to that imagery. I’ve painted angels only once before and that was nearly twenty years ago but I think this is who showed up – and it is both me and thee.
I am empty now and full, open to the unknown around today’s corner, ready for what emerges and yet not eager to step forth – waiting, gestating, wonder-ing. May we all remember how blessed we are to experience living each moment we are here.